Name and Number

Frank_Francisco_hat_tipThe trick to navigating life is perception. For example, you might think Miguel Batista is old, but Jamie Moyer wants Batista off his lawn.

So did the Brewers. But they only got four hits off him in seven innings, so maybe get some more hits off him if you want him off the lawn sooner. (Age ain’t nothin’ but a number.) Batista led the Mets to a 3-1 victory in which Frank Francisco came back to Citi Field to the soundtrack of boos and got his ninth save of the season. A “save”, mind you, which included two hits, a run, and a walk. But he technically saved the day. I don’t know if Francisco can call this a bounce back, and I don’t know if he feels better. I know I do … but I just took a ton of morpheme.

In other words, Frank did nothing to dispel the notion that you shouldn’t trust anybody with two first names, especially when it’s the same damn name. Sure, they could be in two different languages. But whether he’s Frank Francisco, Franz Francois, or Frantisek Freakin Francho, I don’t trust the guy. Here’s infallible proof: “Frank”, in Scottish Gaelic, translates to “Frangag”. And in Bulgarian, Frank translates to … get ready … “Frantsisk”. So we got a guy whose name seriously translates to Sisk and gag. What could possibly go wrong???

Hell, Francisco had a worse line than our old Francisco … Rodriguez, who gave up a run on a hit when Aramis Ramirez lost the baseball on a rundown as he chased David Wright to home plate. Sources say that after the game Frankie “showed Aramis the family room”.


About metstradamus

I've been a Mets fan since 1976. The 1988 NLCS still bothers me infinitely more than it should. I also write about hockey for Puck Drunk Love. I've also been referred to as "Mr. Testosterone", and "this clown". We'll always have 2015.