Hawkins Hallion

Poetry Of The Absurd

I see the sphere rolling
White on red on green
The convergence of colors takes me to a special place
When life seemed uncomplicated
And I reflect on where my life went wrong as green turns to red turns to white
Converging to turn into one color
Representing the sunset of my life

This was written by Ike Davis … in his head … as he was watching Joey Votto's hit roll down the right field line. Ike Davis? Poet? It's as good an excuse as any as to why Davis didn't bother to move away from first base as Votto was rounding it, causing Votto to be awarded second base on the rarely invoked "Slumping First Baseman Who Is Taking His Problems To The Field With Him's Interference". And it helped to kick off a game which was positively absurd … except for the loss, which was totally expected.

Shaun Marcum couldn't quite work around Davis' foray into the other world as Brandon Phillips drove home a run with a single, and Jay Bruce drove two home with a double. Marlon Byrd tied the game in the fourth with a three run HR, but Marcum … who had danced around a Reds threat in the fifth, gave up the lead for good by giving up a home run to Bruce, who is slowly becoming the new Mets killer. Consider: In 110 at bats against the Mets in his career, Bruce has 17 HR's. Work that out to Bruce's 162 game average of 590 at-bats, Bruce would have 91 home runs over a full season if all he faced was Mets pitching.

Then you had LaTroy Hawkins' ejection in the seventh, as he and Tom Hallion argued about everything that happened in the seventh between pitch location, a ball that hit the knob of Phillips' bat, and presumably what font to print their party invitations in.

The Mets' last shot was in the ninth, but they went down 1-2-3 against Aroldis Chapman. On Monday night, Chapman exposed two huge Mets weaknesses. First one being the Mets striking out at an alarming rate, as Chapman struck out Mets batters number 363 and 364 on the season. Second, it exposed the Mets lack of foresight as they failed to leave boxes of eclairs from Mama's of Corona in front of Chapman's locker. Chapman reportedly pigged out on Cuban pastries before Sunday's game against the Phillies when he gave up two straight dingers to lose the game. He reportedly downed 18 of the tasty treats before the game. To blow a game against the Mets though, Chapman would have had to go on Jonathan Broxton's pregame diet: 18 pastries, and three live oxen. At least it was worth trying. But the Mets, like their first baseman, were caught daydreaming.


About metstradamus

I've been a Mets fan since 1976. The 1988 NLCS still bothers me infinitely more than it should. I also write about hockey for Puck Drunk Love. I've also been referred to as "Mr. Testosterone", and "this clown". We'll always have 2015.